I’m a little sore, a little tired, but overall doing just great
because of the support of so many loving people.
Each day I get to see pictures of people doing things they enjoy,
wearing dresses they’d left at the back of the closet,
sending notes of remembrance or encouragement.

Not to mention that my husband is doing the cooking and laundry.
That alone puts a spring in my step.

I’m glad that something so bad
could cause a little ripple of good
through the universe.

“you have inspired a whole crowd of ladies who move through life happy
enough but not always feeling their purpose. You have given us a
collective purpose – supporting you while also connecting to the parts
of ourselves we have left behind in the hectic pace of life…the parts
we didn’t feel were special or important enough to celebrate. Each day
is a gift and I hope to see you keep smiling with each new hill you
have climbed.” – Donna

“You have no idea how many people you are helping, I forward your blog
posts to four people every day.” – Lori

Notes like these make me realize
how much we all can use some good.

It makes me even more committed to teaching the technical skills of
getting what really matters to you.

Here are three of my favorite posts from last week:
More Love from Uncle Richard – hilarious
Dedicated to Crankiness – no sugarcoating
Happy 19th anniversary to my husband Scott – mwah!

And while all this is going on,
Truly Accomplished is getting a wonderful online upgrade
that I anticipate launching at the end of July.
I’ll share a sneak peek of the Personal Success Meter software
in my next note.

Like the project on Facebook here: www.facebook.com/33dresses
or visit the site at www.33dresses.com. Post your pics, and I’ll
post mine.

Share the 33 dresses idea with someone who would enjoy it,
and spread some happiness.

Last week I told you I was dealing with radiation
by starting a special project, 33 dresses.

It now has it’s own site at www.33dresses.com
and facebook page at www.facebook.com/33dresses.
Here’s the amazing video my BFF made for me.

Finding the good in something bad
isn’t just blowing off the bad.

That won’t work. There is nothing good about losing the people we love to cancer or anything else. But there are definitely moments so good that nothing can take them away.

They remind us that happiness is available to us all the time.

And when you’re miserable,
let’s hope it helps you do something else good – eventually!

As the therapist joke goes…
“He’s such a jerk!” says one therapist. The other responds,
“Yep, he’s just one life crisis away from being a decent person.”

Isn’t that true? It’s our crappy experiences that can make us kinder.
There are going to be mandatory times when life is tough,
so why make them tough when it’s optional?

And when the going gets tough,
you can always wear a dress.

Join me! Wear a dress or enjoy another treat that’s right for you.
I start treatment April 30, and will be done and celebrating by June 15.
(It’s M-F every week for 33 treatments)

You can see it on Facebook even if you are not a Facebook member at
www.facebook.com/33dresses
or visit the site at www.33dresses.com.
Post your pics, and I’ll post mine.

Share the 33 dresses idea with someone who would enjoy it, and spread some happiness.

My great news – I won’t have to do chemotherapy, just radiation and hormone therapy. Yay! (Radiation sounds like a Cinco de Mayo party in comparison.)

But now that I am about to do it, it’s not sounding much like a party at all.

Which brings us to this question. What do you do when faced with something you really don’t want to do, but know you’re going to have to do anyway?

I’ve had to practice this a lot this year. Here are my three tips.

1. Say “I don’t want to! “ preferably alone and with a tantrum.
Stomp your feet. Give in to not liking it. Give in big time.
You’re not saying you can’t. You’re not saying you won’t.
You’re telling the truth, which always makes you more powerful.
You do have to do it, but you don’t have to like it.

Once your inner two-year-old has had his or her say, it’s a lot easier to put on your big girl boots again and step forward. Repeat as necessary.

2. Let someone else unfreeze you.
When you don’t know what to do, put someone else in charge for a few minutes.

I have this big box of vitamins to take. Over the next month, I am to take ALL of the contents of this box. Some are to boost nutrients that are low very quickly. Some are to prevent radiation side effects. Some are to prevent recurrence, which is highest during the first 18 months.

Dying? Surgery? No, it was a simple box of vitamins that overwhelmed me.

I couldn’t even open the bottles to sort them into daily portions.
Enter the friends to whom I said, ‘Look at this big box of vitamins. It’s so big, I can’t even open it and sort it out.’ And what did they say? ‘Let us do it, right now.” And they did. And as a result I started taking my vitamins – all 42 a day of them.

3. Add something you GET to do to what you HAVE to do.
What might put the Cinco de Mayo back into your party?
Can you sandwich the bad part with something you’d look forward to?
- The long work trip + dinner with a friend.
- The kids’ soccer practice + a walk for you around the track.
- The attorney meeting + tennis.

My radiation is going to be 33 treatments, seven weeks, every day, M-F.
Gulp. But doing it wearing a dress sounds a bit more uplifting.

For each of my 33 treatment days, I’m going to wear 33 different dresses.

A dress because it’s pretty and girly, and flies in the face of everything that breast cancer threatens to take away.

But even more, it’s a reminder
to wear our dresses, cufflinks, hawaiian shirts,
use our china,
call our moms,
and generally stop saving things up for a special occasion.

I’m bummed when I read Craig’s list and see ‘beautiful dining table, twenty years old, used four times.’ I don’t want that to be you or me. As Hallmark says, life is a special occasion.

I, for one, am not going to look back and say, I wish I’d worn more dresses.

Join me! Wear a dress or enjoy another treat that’s right for you. Wear your jewelry, your cufflinks, buy flowers, have lunch with a friend.

If you’re in, Like the project on Facebook here. www.facebook.com/33Dresses

It’s the honeymoon period between surgery and treatment where you just keep feeling better and better.

Three weeks past surgery I finally felt like myself again.

Sure, I would still hit a wall and need to stop sometimes, but I was back at 100%.

Back to facilitating strategy on the whiteboard in meeting rooms!
Back to private client calls outsmarting career and general life obstacles!
Back to that sweet motherhood mix of being loved and taken for granted!

Best of all, our conversations stopped being colored by cancer.

For example, two weeks earlier, my seven-year-old son dressed up as George Washington for a biography project at school. Just as he’s about to go out the door, he tells me, ‘you know, Mom, George Washington’s mom died when he was seven.’ Bummer.

A huge burst of nesting instinct hit.

Perhaps it’s the act of not dying that gets you all fired up for living? It’s almost like having a baby, where everything must be cleaned and all in good working order, NOW. My intolerance for things broken or decaying is suddenly nil.

In that spirit, I gardened like crazy, and co-opted the kids into ‘redesigning’ our house over spring break– this is like clean up, but with a trip to Target for throw pillows. They bought this enthusiastically for about four hours into a twelve-hour project, and by then it was too late and they were my minions.

It’s not over, but you can see it from here.

Next week I’ll share my treatment plan with you – I don’t know it yet either – and I’ll share what I’ve learned you and I can both do to keep cancer out, out, out.

The thing about living through something that seems like it’s going to break your heart, is that if it doesn’t kill you, you find a new normal a lot faster than it seems possible. Two months ago I was working on my will and feeling exhausted. Today I’m working on the Easter menu and feeling encouraged. That’s in HUGE part thanks to wonderful friends who are walking with me through this time.

Your strength is such a comfort, I can’t even begin to say.

In the meantime, I hope you’re enjoying some vacation this month too!